This was the year we became Film Stars.  Andy’s dad had a Cine camera and on the 19th October we drove out to a sleepy hollow called ‘Scaniport’, to make our first movie.

The Beast of Scaniport

Starring, Alister Baldwin, Andrew Sarjeant and Cameron Fraser

It started off with the three of us out for a leisurely cycle ride and we stopped off for a rest in Scaniport.  We got into an argument and I stormed off on my bike.  The other two became concerned for my whereabouts (after about 10 seconds) and set off to find me.  They found me (after about 10 seconds) spread-eagled on the road, dead! At first it seemed that I had been killed by a massive bottle of Tomato Ketchup, as I was covered in the stuff, but something much more sinister had happened. I had become the first victim of ‘The Beast of Scaniport’.

As this was a low budget film, we didn’t actually show the Beast killing me, because I had a dual role in this film as myself and as the Beast.  So after finding me dead, Andy and Cam panicked and tried to get out of Scaniport as quickly as they could.  However they got separated up a country lane and Cameron became the second victim of The Beast, mercilessly slayed and dumped in a ditch. Andy tried to escape, but when he stopped to gather his thoughts, the Beast pounced from the bushes and beat Andy to death.  The film finishes with the Beast (basically, me with a blanket over my head) hobbling up the path, looking like ‘The Hunchback of Notre Dame’.